My daughter was age 2 when I became a single dad. Suddenly my life changed and I felt like it was the first day of college except this time my major was “Raising Girls 101.”
Needless to say, I think I graduated, but now I’m all of a sudden in the graduate program of that same field of study. Gone are the day care years and fighting with car seats, stepping on Barbie doll feet while walking through the house in the dark or tapping Barbie’s leg back on after the dog chewed it off. Not to go without mentioning the endless hours of watching that purple thing named Barney on the television. The years of day care and elementary school have also come and gone and now it’s middle school. Those years that many of my friends experienced as parents and have warned me about are almost over.
There is no textbook or motivational dad speeches that can teach us dads the correct way to raise a girl. Each day we learn lessons by trial and error. It’s much like school in many ways because there is a lot to learn in a short amount of time. But on the flip side, it’s lessons I enjoy. For my daughter who is an eighth grader, these middle school years haven’t been as bad as my friends have warned me about. The main things I have noticed in this stage of her life are the growing fads. We all know about them because those were so important to us when we were teens although they are much different now. I can pull out my middle school yearbooks and as we look back at the past, it’s more of a comic book to her because of the styles that have changed so much. She gets a good laugh at the hairstyles, lack of makeup, and clothing styles of those middle school girl years.
Their lives change so fast and even though she’s just preparing to make the transition from middle school to high school I can remember dropping her off at day care just like it was yesterday. The early days of elementary school when we walked our kids to class hugged them bye and told them “I love you” are gone and replaced by a quick drop off at the middle school curb, no hug and a quiet whisper of “I love you.” Don’t dare do those things now because it is embarrassing them. I do enjoy the split-second moment of opportunity I have when the car door opens and she begins to get out and I voice the “I love you” a little louder. Her expression and eye contact aren’t quite as warm as I remember it in the day care years.
Over these years I can see how my daughter has grown into a young lady. As those times have breezed by I still wonder am I doing the textbook things that I am supposed to do. But then again as I watch her enjoy these early stages of life knowing that she’s happy, healthy and knows that she loved, that’s rewarding enough for me.
Dallas Bordon is the former sports editor of The Comer News/Danielsville Monitor and a regular contributor to The Madison County Journal.
